“When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable.”-Madeleine L’Engle


Carmen H Gray

the best part

of seeing you

is the familiar parts

of your face

forever etched in my mind

how your upper lip protrudes

ever so slightly

just like in pictures of you

in utero

when I felt soft flutters of life

only now the quavering

appears to reside

in my radiant heart


hope, letting go, Uncategorized

The Pride Lie Veil

“Humility is nothing but truth, and pride is nothing but lying.”- St. Vincent de Paul

The Pride Lie Veil

by Carmen H Gray

When no one can admit a wrong

Because it would pull the tiniest thread

Opening the unravelling of a lie lifelong

Every inconsequential detail

Becomes significant

 In the constructed veil

It is rebellious to be humble

To have courage to begin

To dissolve and crumble

The Pride Lie Veil

hope, letting go, Uncategorized


too many enjoy to watch others crash n burn but it kills them to see u rise like a phoenix from the ashes...


by Carmen H Gray

In the sea of flames

I watched the shells of me and you

Slide, almost too easily

Into the pit

Dismembered parts

Of old selves

And WOOSH, I suddenly felt

The wings of a raptor

Lifting me in the skies

Was it carrying me

Or did those wings belong to me?

No matter

The wind beckoned me onward

The sounds of clouds (who knew they could sing?)

In my ears

The taste of the brisk air

On my tongue

Senses awakened

Me, rising



letting go, Uncategorized

The Dynamic Process of Becoming

“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.”

Alan Watts

The Dynamic Process of Becoming

by Carmen H Gray

Protons can be neither lost nor gained

Stubbornly clinging to an atom

All that has been overcome

Forceful, indomitable

Defining the atom

For if it is lost

It becomes a different element

That is how stars are born

Violent collisions

In the Dynamic Process of Becoming

letting go, Uncategorized

Through The Glass

“So as through a glass, and darkly
The age long strife I see
Where I fought in many guises,
Many names, but always me.”-from Through A Glass, Darkly  by Gen. George S. Patton, Jr.


Through The Glass

by Carmen H Gray

Wisdom doesn’t happen from being wise

It is not a matter of age

Or time or experiences

You become acquainted with it

Or, rather, it acquaints itself with you


In foolish moments of absurdity

Scattered in the wreckage and suffering

As you step beyond the darkness

And see through the glass again

letting go, Uncategorized

Swan Song To My Old Self

Swan Song To My Old Self

by Carmen H Gray

Silenced, I

Tried to keep up

But could not fly

Named and defined

By the periphery

Left me lost and blind

You led me to see

Glimpses of

A new reality

In the still water

Where I saw

My son and daughter

And all of the faces

Extensions of me

And all of the places

I would find

A song issuing forth

Leaving my old self behind


Shelf Life

Shelf Life

by Carmen H Gray

Once upon a time

Hiding behind the bedroom door

You sat

Sturdy and proud

A place to put

Little treasures

From her pockets

You watched it all unfold

Left behind

To witness walls coming down

But she and I

Came back to see

All the new things happening

And we found you still there

Guarding the room

Waiting for us

To take you with us

A different place

To sit proud again