letting go, living

Life Aquatic

Life Aquatic

by Carmen H Gray

Look into their eyes

See we are each other

The wound of alienation

Instability of isolation

Needs a balm

Something to inhibit

Something to calm

The heat, the pressure

Our stories are singular

Within our limited sight

Until we see each other

As combined, voluminous light

Everything external initiates within

And returns there, too

Fear, love, shame, grace

The things outside reflect

The soul’s birthplace

Can it be subdued?

Can it be unbound?

Can we overcome the things

That keep us deeply drowned?

We were once aquatic

Can we go there again?

To that vulnerable state?

Of symbiotic harmony

An encased vertebrate

Exchanging cells

And tissue growth

Can we come back to this life

And see one another

For who we are

Without the violent strife?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hope, letting go, nature

Wings

Wings

by Carmen H Gray

I traveled into the black hole

I was warned I’d be spaghettified

Maybe I have been

My heart was stretched

My thoughts were ripped apart

And all things were upended

They said “you won’t make it back”

Fare thee well

“You will be dead to me” I heard

But death begets a new life

For inside a chrysalis

A being dissolves

Unrecognizable

Spaghettified, one might say

I don’t think I made it back

To where I was

The world is not as it was before

Within the limitless chaos

There is order in the unexpected

Hope IS the thing with feathers

Like Emily writes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

letting go, nature

Me, Too

Me, Too

by Carmen H Gray

My great grandmother somehow had to make a living

After her husband died and she had children to feed

She was quite exquisite

Even as she washed wealthy people’s clothes

And took on other unsavory tasks

Like all women have done

Like all powerless people do

Do not think you are above it

The Me, Too’s

Or that you would have done anything differently

This land was built by Me, Too’s

Your house was cleaned by Me, Too’s

Your children have been nursed by Me, Too’s

Our history is wrought with Me, Too’s

Shut your gaping mouth

At the false display of surprise

Me, Too’s are unearthing a truth

Held sickly sweet inside

Rooted in depths of darkness

Time to birth it

The water breaks

The earth quakes

The fires blaze

As we raise

From the long forgotten past

The Me, Too’s

Me and You

 

 

 

 

hope, letting go

Tenderness

Tenderness

by Carmen H Gray

Tender darkness with tendrils

That reach deep into the aching

Kissing our self-pity, rocking our illnesses

So sweet and comfortable in our cocoons

Tender silence from broken parts

Of mauled noises that struck our ears

Leaving us thrashing about

But you have to be still to hear the softness again

Tender wounds that weep with pus

But are covered ever and anon

Does it hurt more to extricate the poison?

Is tender just a state of mind?

Like a word that can be changed

With one letter

Tinder sparks that spread

Cauterizing the damage

Ushering in light, passion, heat, sound

Opening up to a new

Tenderness

 

letting go

An Element of Blank

“Pain—has an Element of Blank—
It cannot recollect
When it begun—or if there were
A time when it was not—

It has no Future—but itself—
Its Infinite Contain
Its Past—enlightened to perceive
New Periods—of Pain.”-Emily Dickinson

An Element of Blank

by Carmen H Gray

I am enlightened to perceive

An Element of Blank

Meaning, I have been split open

My atomic number is zero

There is no simpler existence

Than to be enlightened to perceive

An Element of Blank

I live on that plane

Smack dab in the middle of

Between the periods of

Pain

Where I am enlightened to perceive

The next layer, the next level

Of intangible, undeniable ranges of

Pain

And that is the great secret

That creates a sense of cessation of

Pain

 

 

 

 

living

Circle

“We can’t return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game”-Joni Mitchell

 

Circle

by Carmen H Gray

 

Equidistant

Perfect movement forward

Sliding Downward

Then Upward

Each point containing

Its own perfect perspective

Of Existence

All around us

Vectors teaching us

A fraction of a change

Moves the course

Flowing round, flowering

Each dying end turning

Back into life

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hope, nature

View From Above

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View From Above

by Carmen H Gray

A branch broke under his weight

I looked up and saw only the white tips

Of a grand wing span

The sun cleansing fetid remnants of forages

His eyes met with mine

As if to say,

Patience, my queen

Learn how to reprocess life

For I am the essence of

Resourcefulness and nobility

Not a living thing shall I take

Not a breath shall I steal

Not a neck shall I break

A strange and curious power lies

In turning death back into life

hope, letting go, Uncategorized

Tiny Golden Slippers

“Yo no quiero que a mi niña
la vayan a hacer princesa.
Con zapatitos de oro
¿cómo juega en las praderas?”-de Miedo por Gabriela Mistral

“I don’t want them to turn my little girl into a princess. In tiny little gold slippers, how could she play in the meadow?”-from Fear by Gabriela Mistral

Tiny Golden Slippers

By Carmen H Gray

Let her be so strong

That the shiny strings of longing

No longer draw her in

Let her echo a resistance

That all of the fear mongering

Is laughable in her brilliance

Let her be so wise

That her wings lift her to the skies

To see the earth

With both discerning eyes

Let my mistakes teach her,

Speak quietly to her heart

And gently, carefully reach her

So she may with grace part

From any notion of dreams withheld

And lastly, may she break

The last pair of tiny golden slippers

Worn for others’ sakes

 

letting go, Uncategorized

Pieces of Her

“Arrange whatever pieces come your way”-Virginia Woolf

Pieces of Her

by Carmen H Gray

She wept

And each

Salt-filled drip

Contained pieces of her

A uniquely composed

Momentary release

Of cells on the verge of

Elapsed time

Recalling an ending

Opening the space

For the conception

Of pieces of her

Arranged by her

With her

For her

In that when

That moment dies

It is a pretty death

With liquid attendants

Saying farewell with love